Joys of being a waitress

I've been a waitress since the age of 17, I'm 24. I've done other things as well, but I've been a waitress the majority of my working life.

I don't particularly enjoy it, but I have nice moments, like today. Huge tips on small bills make me happy, coming home with 25% tips and finding out that my shift pay was paid in today makes me happy. Money can't buy happiness, but getting money for doing the minimal is worth my time.

Now, not everyone can provide a service such as waiting, so, I am special in my own way. There are horrible waiters in every restaurant, they get your orders wrong, they don't smile or try to be friendly in any way, they might even be rude, and they are definitely slower than cancer.

I on the other hand smile, and chat, and make jokes, and I'm fast. Now and then I do forget a few small things like straws or extra napkins, but I don't get orders wrong, I have a talent of memorizing everything, and I sincerely care about what is served to customers.

Then on the other hand, if you're going to be cocky or rude or arrogant, don't expect anything from me, except if you're friends with the owners. I won't care if you wait for your drinks, I'll smoke an extra cigarette, just so you won't be able to find me to place another order, because I know you've never been a waiter, you haven't served anyone in return for tips, you don't know how a restaurant works, and maybe... Just maybe... YOU SHOULD HAVE ORDERED IN!

My rule is: "If you're not going to pay for service, don't ask for it."


If you've waited, you know what a sad moment is if you have a large table, a huge bill, and a lousy tip. That's the reason people spit in your food.

The funniest is if a customer thinks everyone knows what he's drinking. This particular customer is the poster child of naivety. He will hand you an empty glass and say "can you get me another one?". No I can't. Do I look psychic? The ice has melted away the last bit of aroma and I can't even smell what was in that glass...

Idiots.

My favorite one is: "I want a steak and chips."

We serve rump, sirloin, and T-bones. They come in different sizes. Then there are six different levels of having them done, most commonly MEDIUM.

Is it that hard to order steak?

Here's another one, a huge reason why I have a limited amount of female friends. Most girls are irritating. They order brandy and coke, you take it to them and then they ask: "Can we have straws please?"

Sure, I'll walk all the way back to the bar, get two useless, plastic straws and watch you destroy the environment. Why do I say destroy the environment? They use one straw only once, because with the next round of drinks they want new straws.

Another reason I don't like this:

SOUTH AFRICANS DON'T DRINK BRANDY AND COKE WITH F-ING STRAWS.

I like it when people order weird drinks though, like double tequila and lime on the rocks. Or instead of a jagerbomb, they drink banana liqueur with creme soda.

I hate it when people ask what our cheapest shot is. Really? Think of something you like and order it. Easy. I also hate it when people ask what shots we have. My answer: "A lot." And no, I'm not going to stand there and name all of them. If you want a parrot, buy one, don't go places to make people say stupid stuff.

Bottom line is, my children WILL be waiters one day to make sure they get common sense which should actually be more common.

Lust for life

My sister almost got high jacked a few days ago. She drove away, balls of steel. It made me think, because she was extremely traumatized afterwards, I think I would have done the same.

I have a bucket list, it contains things like bungee jumping, getting a tattoo, traveling the world, and weirder things like learning how to shoot with a rifle, getting tick fever, overcoming some horrible disease, and surviving a car accident.

Some things, once again, make me appreciate life a little bit more, and it makes me want to plan a better life for myself.

Recently I started cycling, I look ridiculous doing it, my balance is off, and I'm not that good at it, but it's a start to a better life.

My dad's cholesterol is normal for the first time in 16 years, mine has gone up to 5.4, and it has to be below 4.9. Oops.

Getting back on topic, I was thinking about trainspotting, how a guy changed his life around and made the best of himself... Almost...

Anyway, at the beginning of the move (or the end, i forget) Rent says:

Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family.
Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars,
compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good
health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed
interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your
friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a
three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics.
Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning.
Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing
game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose
rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable
home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up
brats you spawned to replace yourself.

Choose your future.

Choose life.

I'm going to have a wonderful life with work related stress, financial problems, car problems, house problems, and struggle with health for the rest of my life whilst trying to keep relationships in order, and trying to find myself till the day I die. I don't know where I'll see myself in ten years, I don't know that I will drive away when someone tries to high jack me. I want hobbies, and dinner parties with fancy entrees and delightful deserts, maybe start a small business, but definitely have enough to provide for my family. I hope that I will be successful in my career, and with raising children, and I really hope that I will make a difference in this world, a major one.

I don't want to be famous, I want to have a name.

Troy

The story, the real story, of Troy is all about love, deceit, and jealousy. The love for Helen of Troy caused a whole city to be brought down.

Recently, I had a thing with my first love again. It wasn't a mistake, it just put my life into perspective. I can do better. I need someone better. I wrote him the last letter I will ever write to him. Short and sweet, I wish him the best of luck, and we're not part of each other's futures.

I haven't given it to him, its not time yet.

We've hurt each other in the past. He can't burn me down anymore, but there is no point in staying in touch, except for the fact that he can fix my car.

Cutting my losses is all what life is about now.

Building up my future is the beginning of my dreams.

I applied for the Metro Police, this is my third application. If that doesn't work, I'll be going to the best forensic investigative company in the country. Win-win.

Then, I'll get a house, get friends to live with me to pay it off, and then soon, buy a second house. Get a car, get furniture, maybe start a business on the side...

Travel, go see my friends and family in Europe.

My biggest obstacle right now is my fitness, its been a year and a half and I still haven't done right. The past two weeks I've pushed myself to the limits, we'll see if it pays off in two weeks.

I wrote a letter to myself as well, and I promised the world to myself.

LOL.

All in the mind, but I'm going to build up my own empire. And I'm going to get myself everything I want and need.

And somewhere along the line, I need to find out exactly who I am and what I am capable of.

This life is going to be worth it.