Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Bleed me dry


I went for my 20th blood donation today! That means I've given away 20 pints of blood in my life.

Congratulations to me *Happy dance*







Who am I kidding? I do it for COOKIES!


And to see the BUBBLES in my blood ;)



I'm so proud of myself!



Although Cindi couldn't donate *sad face*, she got her towel!



Save a life! Go donate blood...

And if you go, don't tell the nurses that I tried to kill you by running over you with my car... That's just dumb. *Cough* STUPID EX *Cough*

They all know I'm a bit looney, but not in that way...

Monday, February 10, 2014

A tribute to Linda Dunbar

My ex's mother passed on 9 December 2013.

I went with him to see her. I sent him a poem for her memorial:

Last Fight


A face that is always on my mind,
A smile I have seen a million times,
Two eyes that would light up the sky at night,
One last battle you could not fight,
The day was long, then night then morn.
I knew that soon you would be gone,
I clasped your hand so warm in mine,
Soon we would be out of time,
To stay with us you fought so hard,
A million pieces went my heart,
Now a photo I look at to see your smile,
I keep your number on my speed dial,
A video I watch to hear your voice,
This I do.... I have no choice.,
But great memories I will always keep with me,
Your love in my heart for eternity,
I never got to say goodbye,
To understand why, I can but try,
Waiting in heaven from this moment on,
'Till god asks you to bring me home....

I love you Mum xxx

Change is all

No one will ever know how I feel.
For I cannot even explain it all.
Nobody to love.
Nobody to blame.
Everyone always the same.
Nothing to care about.
No reason to lie.

For I am me, myself, and I.
No ones sees what I see.
Nobody left to care for me.
It's kind of sad knowing what's true, cause then you know who's there for you.
Most of them just put on that act.
A lot of them talk bad about me behind my back.

Thanks for making me feel this way, there's nothing more I should have to say.
All the times I was alone, makes me feel weird when someone's home.
No family for support, no friends to care.
People wonder why I don't go anywhere.
Every night crying myself to sleep, sometimes I wish someone loved me.
No hope, no love, no life, no friends the pain never ends.
Sometimes I ask what did I do to deserve this.

But nobody answers.

A voice in my head tells me to forget the bad and remember good.
But then I answer to myself saying there is no good to remember.
I always yell at myself asking why me? why?
Sitting in a empty spare room.
No one to talk to about how I feel.
No one to ask me what I feel.

Is anyone out there in this harsh world we live in?
Sometimes I begin to wonder.
Sometimes I'm harsh on myself.
Morn comes and I wake up wishing I was never born.
Please help others, because today's lives our being taken out of this world just as easy as they are coming in.
You can change someone's life.
Make a change.
It's a tough world.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Year of Horse - Chinese Horoscope 2014 for Chinese Zodiac Rabbit

The rabbit has represented hope for a long time, by Chinese people. It is tender and lovely. The moon goddess Chang'e in Chinese legend had a rabbit as her pet, which stimulated the thought that only this creature was amiable enough to match her noble beauty. The Chinese character 'Tu' (rabbit) is part of 'Yi' (escape or leisure) indicating speed and distance. The Han people have a custom that a pregnant woman is not allowed to eat bunny for fear that the child will be born with a harelip. The newborn is given paintings of children and rabbits representing that the child will have a peaceful and happy life.

Strengths
People born under the sign of the rabbit are gentle, sensitive, compassionate, amiable, modest and merciful, and have strong memory. They like to communicate with others in a humorous manner. They cannot bear dull life, so they are good at creating romantic or interesting spice. They are soft-spoken and welcoming, being fond of peaceful love life. They hate arguing with capacity of converting an enemy into a friend. They are homebody and hospitable, and like house fitting-up.  They can work with speed and efficiency, do not insist and get angry easily.

Weaknesses

They lack meditative abilities and often sink money into ideas that may cause failures in their career. They are amorous and not determined, soft in appearance and stubborn inside. They usually do not submit to dreary life, but create romance. They are not good at delving deeply and likely to escape the reality. They may lose good chances because of reserved personality.

Horoscope and Numerology Elements

Earthly Branch of Birth Year: mao
Wu Xing (The Five Elements): mu (wood)
Yin Yang: yin
Auspicious Directions: east, southeast, south
Lucky Colors: red, pink, purple, blue;
Avoid: dark brown, dark yellow, white
Lucky Numbers: 3, 4, 9; Avoid: 1, 7, 8
Lucky Flowers: snapdragon, flower of fragrant plantainlily, nerve plant
Zodiac Sign Compatibility - Best match: sheep, pig, dog; Avoid: rat, dragon

Fortune Foretelling in 2014

Rabbit is a shy, alert and resourceful animal. It can run very quickly. But Horse can run even faster. Horse can inspire Rabbit's potential, creativity and courage. In Chinese Five Elements theory, Rabbit is in the Wood group. Wood is related to tree. Horse contains Fire, Fire is related to Sun. Tree always need the energy from Sun to grow taller. Therefore, When Rabbit meets Horse, Rabbit receives lots of benefits from Horse. 2014 must be a good year to Rabbit people.
There are Happiness Star, Romantic Star, Sun Star and Blessing Star appearing in year of Wooden Horse. Rabbit people will do well in their career development. They will have good people relationship with their friends and good love relationship with their families. A surprising, joyful and happy event will happen in 2014.

Career:

2014 is Wooden Horse Year. Wood of 2014 brings Rabbit friends, supports and courage. Horse contains Fire and Earth. Earth represents money to Rabbit. Therefore, Horse brings Rabbit talent and money. The conclusion is Rabbit people can handle any challenges of career and earn a good income from their jobs in 2014.

Rabbit people are kind, clam, poised with outstanding talent. They will have many idea out of their mind for their jobs. They also have endless energy to implement their tasks. They have good people relationship in their working environment. Their communication skill will be improved significantly. All these factors will help Rabbit people working easy in the office. But they don't have too much chance for a job promotion, since the Career Star doesn't appear in 2014. But their pay will increase, because the Money Star is hidden in the Horse.

When Rabbit learns how to run faster from Horse, Rabbit might become proud, then arrogant. This will impact the career development. Be nice to people and stay away the political competition are very important for your future career path.

Money:

The money luck is great to Rabbit people in 2014. Rabbit people will use more their talent, appearance, reputation and presentation to earn money. Either you work for someone or own your business, you must use their brain and wisdom to pursuit extra income. This kind of opportunity in 2014 won't happen every year. If you are too lazy, then you still have a good financial year, but you won't have extra saving.

Rabbit people will spend more their time on social activities in the Horse year. Your social expense will increase. If you have personal money transitions with friends, that's not a good idea. If a friend invites you a risky adventure for a quick return, then that's not a good idea, either. There is a sign of money loss related to friends in 2014. Your income must earn using your energy or brain. Your money luck is good in 2014, but you still need to watch the risk.

Love:

Both Romantic Star and Happiness Star are coming in the year of Horse. The love relationship to Rabbit people is super.  Rabbit people don't have too much love opportunity last year, because there was a Lonely Star in 2013. 2014 is totally different. If you are looking for love, then it's time to go out to join social activities. Your appearance and expression will impress people and people will pay more attention on you. The friendship will build from there.

If you are in love, then it's time to build deeper relationship. The engagement or marriage opportunity is possible. But don't push yourself too hard. To respect your lover's feeling and opinion is very critical. If you are marred and plan for a baby, then 2014 is a good year to welcome the new born. This is because that the animal of Rabbit can reproduce its next generation very fast.

Health:

Just like in 2013, Rabbit people need to use lots of brain power for their career and people relationship. Since the busy schedule, Rabbit people should learn better time management for your task and the social events. To maintain a good health is required enough rest and relaxation. There is a hurting sign in 2014. Rabbit people might have to travel more than last year. You should focus the driving safety while on the road.

2014 is a Wooden Horse year, which is a strong Fire year. It's possible that Rabbit people have too much Fire or too less Water in 2014. Too much Fire will cause problem in cardiovascular system. Too less Water will cause problem in urinary system.


Further fortune telling

Overview:

Rabbit people should pay close attention to their physical condition and financial status in 2014. In their career, they should work hard and keep a low profile to avoid the tricks of mean people. They should also be very careful with their actions and words in their daily life and career to safely and smoothly get through the year.

Career:

In general, the outlook for their career is mixed, with both opportunities and risks. They may feel very busy and tired in their jobs, but they can expect promotions and higher salaries. In everyday work, they shouldn't be supercilious and should get along well with all of their colleagues and bosses to increase their likelihood of success. If they plan well, it is also a good time to consider changing jobs. If they encounter any problems at work, their families and friends are always ready to help. 

Wealth:

Their expenses will increase this year, but their income won't go up as fast. Thus they should make ends meet first and have a good plan for money management. When cooperating with others, they should think twice to avoid traps. Businesspeople are advised to conduct a market survey before making any risky investment. Generally, although their fortune in money is not perfect, they won't encounter severe financial problems.

Relationships:

The fortune in love life for rabbit people is expected to positive. Singles have an opportunity to meet their love, especially in May and September. Lovers should consider getting married and if they do, they will enjoy a happy life in the future. There may be frequent arguments between spouses. Wives born in the year of rabbit should well control their emotions to avoid making any unwise decision.

Health:

Generally, their physical condition is good enough, and they don't encounter any serious disease in 2014. They should avoid drinking too much in banquets. To participate in regular sports will help them with body-building. Before violent sports, warming up is very important. They should control their emotions to avoid problems in internal secretion system. If possible, they should take a trip in autumn to improve their physical and mental condition. They should be very careful to avoid sports injuries, especially in August.

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Good-bye and good riddance



Whoever said “keep your friends close and your enemies closer” must have been the biggest idiot alive or the biggest genius. Why would anyone in a normal civilization keep their enemies close, when, once again, you can cut your losses and move on?

The problem occurs when you feel the need to have that person for a personal need. Well, after much consideration, I have decided to get rid of my enemy. Problem was though; he didn’t want to leave me alone. It took me months to get rid of this one, and take note of this because it works, until I convinced him he didn’t want me.

Easier said than done, because believe you me, love really is bat shit blind.

Along with ending this relationship in my life, I have also killed the hope of ever getting money back from my ex. Yes, again… Me and my ex’s stories never ends, and it shouldn’t have to…




I gots my MoJo back!

For the first time in ages, all I want to do it blog my heart out.

And I will.

I have learned that being dependent on a person isn’t worth jack shit. A person depending on you is even worse.

Decisions about your life should be based on other people, to an extent, but it is still YOUR life to live! Whether you are married, single, religious, or agnostic, people should guide you to a better choice, and if they don’t, you have the wrong people.

Have people in your life that is on your team. Have people who will frown upon your decisions, give you advice, but still stand by you while the bomb blows up in your face.

But, quickly! Let’s stop being selfish…

Do your good deeds! Be good for the people you value in your life. Do the unexpected “thank you” card. Organize a get together. Have a movie night. Make your friends’ anniversaries and birthdays special in your way.

Don’t just text.

Instant messaging is, to me anyway, the lamest excuse of having a relationship.

“Says the girl trying to connect with people all across the world”.

Yes, I am a hypocrite. But only when it comes to people I don’t like, so, it doesn’t count.

Here’s the best advice I’ve learned so far in 2014: If people don’t like you, and are nasty to you, first decide if you need them or not. If it’s your boss, you need them. If it’s your ex, or one of those “friends” you vaguely remember from school, you definitely don’t need them. Secondly, kill them with kindness and exceed beyond their expectations of you, until they realize that you are not as bad as they thought you were. Be the better person and prove them wrong.

Smile, because you are beautiful. And you are exactly who you’re supposed to be. If they can’t handle the truth, they must be blind.

I sent my cousin in Scotland a postcard for her birthday.

I saw my godson for the first time in almost a year.

My finances are stabilizing.

My friends are becoming less in numbers, but more valuable than ever before.

I am growing older, but somewhat wiser.

I have lost most of the unnecessary weight I was so depressed about.

I am taking my pills every night.

I am working my ass off for the greater cause.

I am expanding my horizons.

I am living my dream.

I am free.

I hope that you are too. I hope that you get all the happiness you deserve in life.

I am sending out my good thoughts to the whole world now.

I hope that YOU have a great 2014!

XOXO