Brain activity written down: Drastic changes

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Drastic changes

I bragged about how much weight I've lost a while ago. I've talked about my drunken ways and my anxiety and depression. I've said a lot, but the most important things are usually left unsaid.

That being said, I'm on day 2 of Champix, to quit smoking. I have 25-30 kg of fat still to lose, and I think I might have met "the one", but we'll see in a few weeks or months.

Tomorrow I'm going back onto my "only eat when you're hungry diet", which is hard because I'm a waitress surrounded by french fries, CHEESE, chocolate, bread, and all the other things tat cause diabetes and heart failure.

Tomorrow I'm changing myself. Not my life. Just ME.

I'm sick of feeling like the elephant in the room, the smoker that will die in 15 years, and the heart attack waiting to happen. It might be a little over exaggerated, but what will I look like in a year or ten?

I would rather change my medical future than be just another "normal" statistic...

Good bye fat, chubby, gross, porky, obese me. Let's see what I can accomplish in a month and then twelve months.

I might just become pro Ana ;)

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Lessons in Life

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned that no matter how much I care some people just don't care back.

I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but whom you have in your life that counts.

I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And, just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt, and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned that heroes are people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.